Maid of Honor: the Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Do you guys watch Sex and the City? You know that scene in the movie, where Carrie tells Samantha she is getting married, and wants her to be her maid of honor, and Sam replies it’s “painful and unnecessary”?

Well, something similar happened to Jemma and myself nearly a year ago. For future reference, Jemma is my bestie, also known as my beasty, and the two of us have been inseparable since the day she put an egg in my shoe in kindergarten. Even with the time difference we are facing today, even with my insane travel schedules – we still manage to crab the same Sunday cup of coffee, even if it does mean one of us getting up in the middle of the night and having a decaf.

I’m babbling – let’s get back to the point.

The Engagement

Jemma and Jake have been dating for seven years, if memory serves me correctly, and the logical next step was for them to get married. They got engaged last winter, and when they did, we had pretty much the same conversation as Carrie and Samantha. She wanted me to be the maid of honor, and I wanted to not be involved in any formal sense. I was naturally thrilled for her, but weddings are simply not my thing. I have been living in sin for a decade now, so needless to say, I don’t much care about the entire shebang.

But, I was going to put a brave face on and enjoy the entire process. With Jem, I knew it would be a twist and a turn a day, and I was quite right. Let me tell you a bit about our experience as bride and bride’s maid.

The Good

Needless to say, the best part of being a maid of honor is getting to help your friend out at every single dilemma, every time she needs someone to lean on and vent to. This is what friends are for, isn’t it?

We’ve had some wild moments in bridal shops, let me tell you. I could not and would not be forced into trying a dress on, but she was brave enough to try some insane pieces. We’ve had a ton of fun in a cake shop as well, and I think we both gained a couple of pounds stuffing our faces with frosting. Pro tip: have a cake tasting! You can eat as much delish cake as you want, all in the name of friendship.

Another pro tip: have a champagne tasting as well. This was not something I would have thought of, and going to a local wine store was the perfect cure to a lazy and hazy Saturday when I was just about to not move out of bed.

I was also most thrilled to help her choose the style of her wedding – we mixed and matched colors and décor for weeks. I kept scrolling through Pinterest on my flights and I also found some great inspo on wedding photography sites, like this one. It was all great fun. I think the final effect will be great – she’s going for purples, which is not something I would have thought for her.

And one of the best things was the choice of 3 days in Prague for a hen “night” – that was a great weekend.

Another great part is how the groom managed to stay on his feet and survive everything we threw at him – so here are some tips for him as well.

The Bad

The bad is all a part of the good, of course – and it involves the seven hundred and seventy six times she changes her mind on a daily basis. Brides are tough, let me tell you. No wonder some are called bridezillas.

With Jem, it all revolved around the food. The dress was easy, once we came down to it, but the menus were my worst nightmare for a month. She kept changing them so much that the venue manager finally stopped accepting any changes in earnest, because she was bound to switch something again. In the end, Jake and myself managed to cut out the crap, pardon my French, and we now have a delish dinner to look forward to in a few months’ time.

There will also most likely be tears, and if you are like me and hate when other people cry because you don’t know how to deal with it – you will be majorly uncomfortable.

The Ugly

This is going to sound like the worst cliché out of the worst bridal chick flick ever. The ugly is the dress. My dress. I have to match the bridesmaids, because that is the kind of wedding they want. The dresses are pink. I have never worn pink, well, not after the age of five. I look like a cupcake in pink. It clashes with my skin tone too. But, I am wearing pink.

A piece of advice, if you are also struggling with the bride’s choice of dress – you can have an opinion. We had it out about the color, and my voice was heard, so we are not going for this other shade of pink that looked even worse. Yes, it’s all about the bride, but you don’t have to take it overboard. She is still your friend, even when she is a bride.

Well, this has been a long one – luckily my battery has not died yet. We are somewhere over Portugal I feel right about now, and will be landing fairly soon. I need to remember I have a blog, and that I do need to write sometimes, don’t I.

I’ll let you all know how the wedding goes. Jem will never let me post pictures of her, but I will try to sneak one in of me in the hideous pink poof. Well, it’s actually not that bad, I just don’t like it. After all, who says I have to like it.

Have you been a maid of honor yet? Or are you a serial bridesmaid? Tell me how it went, with the prep and the wedding. Most importantly, how did you write your speech? I don’t have issues with speaking in front of huge crowds, so I will most likely not start to babble in front of 300 people, but I have no idea what I want to say.

Let me know!








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